Trump University Valedictorian Speech Class of 2009. The New Yorker’s “Shouts and Murmurs,” December 2016

Make America Grape AgainMcSweeney’s Internet Tendency, July 2016

New York’s Lesser Known AttractionsThe Towner, May 2016 

Manhattan in 11031 A.D. The New Yorker’s “Shouts and Murmurs,” June 2015

The Bear at the Front Door. Tin House, May 2014

NotificationsThe New Yorker’s “Shouts and Murmurs,“ June 2013

Some Rich White Male Writers You May Have Missed. Tin House, June 2013

Murder Your Darlings. Tin House, April 2013

How To Interpret Your Rejection Letters. Tin House, February 2013

The New England Journal of Medicine offers user “Josh95” a chance to revise his comment on their blogMcSweeney’s Internet Tendency, January 2013

Books To Buy Your Pet This Holiday Season. Tin House, December 2012

How to Apply to an MFA Program. Tin House, October 2012

5 1/2 Writers Under 11. Tin House, August 2012

How to Write Erotic Fiction. Tin House, July 2012

Please Read: Important Procedure Change for Contacting the I.T. DepartmentThe New Yorker’s “Shouts and Murmurs,” May 2012

The Importance of Being Affected. Tin House, April 2012

Why Do We Hate Short Stories? Tin House, March 2012