3 Books You Should Read Before You Turn 3

Flavorwire currently has a list of 30 books you should read before you turn 30. That is an interesting idea for a list. Though, unfortunately for Flavorwire, it is not nearly as interesting as my idea for a list: 3 BOOKS YOU SHOULD READ BEFORE YOU TURN 3. See below.

1.) Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James

As a baby, you have a lot of spankings ahead of you. This book could very well help you learn to enjoy them.

2.) The Prince by Niccolò Machiavelli

Using Machiavelli’s basic principles of leadership and manipulation, you can avoid potty training well into you mid-20’s.

3.) The Real Frank Zappa Book by Frank Zappa

At this point, your knowledge of experimental rock from the last century is most likely limited to what you see on Yo Gabba Gabba!.

This book will give you the inside scoop, along with more fun anecdotes about Alice Cooper and Captain Beefheart than you’ll know what to do with.