Happy Halloween: A Seth Fried Fan's Guide to a Safe and Successful All Hallows' Eve

Arguably the most costume-oriented holiday of the year is steadily approaching, and everybody here at Seth headquarters is getting into the spirit. As you can see, my book has decided to go as Stieg Larsson’s The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. Adorable.

Also, this year I’ll be staying home to hand out sugarless suckers attached to blank applications for library cards, which I’ll be doing in the grim hopes of being egged to death. What can I say? Halloween just brings out my love of the macabre.

In any event, here are a few Halloween safety tips:

1.) If you find a razor blade in one of your fun-sized Snickers bars, DON’T EAT IT! But if you want to use the Snickers bar to shave, that should be fine.

2.) Remember to poke air holes in your costume, especially if you’re going as dry-cleaning.

3.) Fasten reflective tape to your costume. Ideally, you should also place reflective tape on each piece of candy you receive. If you see anything on October 31st that isn’t covered in reflective tape, don’t trust it.

4.) Check your candy to make sure it’s not poisoned. If you need help spotting poisoned candy, a good trick is to take a normal piece of candy and poison it. When testing a piece of Halloween candy for poison, keep some of this pre-poisoned candy nearby and take small bites of both to see if they taste similar. If they do, the candy in question has been poisoned. Don’t eat it.

5.) Make sure to carry a flashlight, even if you are going to an office party.

6.) Remember to have fun exclamation point.